Pastor Jack Van Impe has died after a long illness attributed to lifelong cigarette smoking and complicated by alcohol abuse. His recent affliction with dementia was evident on and off the air by his hateful rants that all Muslims are terrorists, that Jesus is returning rapture ready Dec. 21, 2012 and President Obama who Van Impe said is a Muslim will lead the New World Order and spread socialism. Did you know Jack Van Impe was a "birther"? Van Impe said throughout last year of his life that President Obama attended a Madrassa in Indonesia as a child, is not a Christian and was not an American citizen. All lies says Bill O'Reilly of Fox News. Kirk Cameron is reported to be Jack Van Impe's replacement in the fall and maybe just maybe Bristol Palin will replace Rexella. As for Chuck he hasn't decided his future with JVIM.
Autopsy Update: "Mr. Van Impe's brain had the consistency of Swiss cheese" said Doctor L.R. Hubbard pathologist for the Evangelical Preacher Resource Center and Morgue in Kalamazoo Michigan. "It's amazing he could feed himself".
Some folks believe that Jack Van Impe was a false prophet, a fraud artist or charlatan to others (the mentally unstable fundamentalists) actually think he's "the walking bible".
To send Rexella Van Impe your condolences email her at: firstname.lastname@example.org
Rexella also asks you to give to your local animal shelter instead of donations to JVIM or buying the Prophecy Bible and DVD's. I don't want your money she said, let's do some good for a change. I love animals, Jack didn't like cats, dogs and horses that much so I am going to give away most of Jack's fortune to help those poor helpless creatures. If all of our followers gave $50 to a local animal shelter most of our pet problems would be solved. Tell your family and friends. God Bless furry little creatures!
Our sources tell us that the last 12 weeks of JVIM Presents have been repeats so to speak. You will see Rexella looks towards Jack as usual and asks him, "Oh Jack what do you think of that"? Next scene is a shot of Jack, the producers use past clips of Jack Van Impe reciting his usual stuff. Revelations this Timothy that, The New World Order, Iran's going to attack Israel and Russia & China are coming after you folks in the USA so watch out and btw buy my DVD. Whatever happened to the December 21, 2012 Mayan Prophecy rants? Thankfully these nonsensical rants stopped when he died, any recent episodes are clips in the can and edited programs. Not mentioning Osama Bin Laden's death on the May 8/11 show is proof of his demise ....there is no other explanation. Talk about conspiracy theories.